Proszę o poprawienie błędów i rozbudowanie tego opowiadania.

One time two girls : Lisa and Ania was riding a bike to school. Lisa is 17 years old, she is nice girl. She has got long, brown hair, big, blue eyes and she is very good pupil. She wasn’t never at school late. The second girl- Ania is 17, too. She has blond, straight hair. She goes to the class with Lisa.
Suddenly, they saw young boy in the window. He was scared and he was screaming, because house, (w którym się znajdował), was burning. The girl didn’t mull to help. They comed to a halt and wanted to help im. Ania wanted to prise a door, but she couldn’t.
-I’m going to look for a ladder. – say Lisa.
Few minuts later, she was bring about, step into boy and helped him get out. The boy was safe.
Finally, the young boy say about this situation in TV, and Lisa and Ania was invited to Warsaw. There they became a pots from Community Awards for Bravery. Lisa and Ania’s parents was very proud of children, and girls was very glad and happy, that can help another.

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Odpowiedzi

2010-03-06T20:37:50+01:00
One time TOO girls : Lisa and Ania was riding a BICKE to school. Lisa is 17 years old, she is nice girl. She has got long, brown hair, big, blue eyes and she is very good PUPILS. She wasn’t never at school LATEING. The second girl- Ania is 17, too. She has blond, straight hair. She goes to the class with Lisa. Suddenly, they SAWE YOUING boy in the windowS. He was scared and he was screaming, because house, was burning. The girl didn’t mull to help. They comed to a halt and wanted to help im. Ania wanted to prise a door, but she couldn’t.
-I’m going to look for a ladder. – say Lisa.
Few minuts later, she was bring about, step into boy and helped him get out. The boy was safe.
Finally, the young boy say about situation in TV, and Lisa and Ania was invited to Warsaw. There they became a pots Community Awards for BRAVERS. Lisa and Ania’s parents was very proud of children, and girls was very glad and happy, that can help another.

LICZE NA NAJ