Proszę o sprawdzenie rozprawki. Temat: "Adolescence is the unhappiest time in most people's live."

Everyone agrees that adolescence is very important time in live young people, but not everyone agrees that it is the unhappiest time.
There are several adventages to adolescence. Firstly, it is a time, when the people are meeting new friends and falling in love. Secondly, they are becomming independent and alone decide about your school and your live. Apart from the teenagers can go to work and earn your first money.
However, a lot of people have a lot of problems with parent, because adults don't understand teenagers, Secondaly, young people want to have your own opinion and it often is cause arguments. Apart from everyone' s body is changing and people have problems with pimples and hormones. Also, they are becomming more nervous and aggresive.
In conclusion, I think that adolescence has a good and a negative sides, but im my opinion is more thing, which testify about that adolescence is the unhappiest time. the biggest argument, which verifies it , is it, that the people often have arguments with parents and get worse marks in school.

2

Odpowiedzi

2010-04-05T12:26:41+02:00
Everyone agrees that adolescence is a very important time in lives (live) young people, but not everyone agrees that it is the unhappiest time.
There are several advantages of adolescence. First, it is a time when people meet new friends and fall in love. Secondly, they become independent and to decide themselves about school and life. You can also go to work and earn their first money.
However, many people have problems with parents, young adults do not understand. Young people want to have your own opinion. In addition to all the body is changing and people are beginning to have problems with pimples and hormones. Also, become more nervous and aggressive.
In conclusion, I think that adolescence has a good and a negative sides, but im my opinion is more thing, which testify about that adolescence is the unhappiest time. the biggest argument, which verifies it , is it, that the people often have arguments with parents and get worse marks in school.


Ja zmieniłabym to troche, napisałam Ci własnie tą moją wersje. Pozmieniałam słowa w zdaniach, aby były bardziej spójne. Była chyba jedna tylko literówka. A poza tym podoba mi się. ;))
2010-04-05T12:34:27+02:00
Lot of problem (bez S)
Secondly <--Secondaly (bez a )
Becoming <-- Becomming (bez drugiego m)